In the WMSCOG, people referred to their homes as “the dorm” because they were supposed to be nothing more than a place to crash at night.

Our true “home” was supposed to be the church.

Members were always being moved around to different churches. We were supposed to go wherever we were sent, even if it meant ditching a job and having to find a new one from scratch after moving. “Have no safety net” was the mantra.

Sometimes it was for a mission, sometimes it was a punishment.

To facilitate this constant movement, there were church-arranged “brothers’ dorms” and “sisters’ dorms,” where four to six single brothers or sisters would share an apartment.

Since I wasn’t single, I never lived in a sisters’ dorm, but it was common for even couples to share living arrangements to bring down the rent.

When Thomas and I moved from Maryland to New Jersey, we were put in an apartment with another couple. The brother ended up leaving the church shortly after we moved out, and the sister divorced him.

In New Windsor, NY, we shared a house with another couple. The house had an oil leak in the basement, so fumes were always coming up, and we slept on an air mattress the whole year. It was considered worldly to have furniture.

Living with other members makes it really hard to leave.